Art of The Drunken Fist
by Doctor Wheel
Summary: (Being rewritten)Though he may not look like it, the drunken martial art master Chen is a highly respected teacher and fighter...to those who known him as one that is. But what makes this man so important, you ask? He once taught Rank 1 Hero, Blast. This is one drunk you would not want to piss off.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: One of my experimental stories. Have fun!**

"Urg, why is the ground spinning so much? I never see it do anything like this...at least not since yesterday...or an hour ago...or was that last Tuesday?"

In a dark, narrow alleyway, a man was slowly coming to his senses. He was a large man, with a prominent gut, and had black hair along with a beard. The clothes he wore, a green shirt under a black vest, black pants, and sandals, were tattered and had various stains on them.

He also appeared to be somewhat drunk, judging from the smell of alcohol coming from him.

"I need a drink...where is it?" he said looking around until he spotted a canteen lying near him. "Ah, there it is."

Picking up the container, he proceeded to take a long drink from it, though drinking could be questioned as most of the liquid spilled down from his face onto his clothes rather than in his mouth.

"Much better," he nimbly hopped to his feet and strapped the canteen to his belt. "Now where am I?"

The man couldn't remember how he got to the alley, much less what happened before he woke up. One thing he knew, it was day, so he must've passed out last night, or a few hours ago...

He slowly stumbled to the entrance of the alley and onto the street of a bustling city.

"I was supposed to do something, but what was it?" he wondered out loud as he took another long swing. "...maybe if I walk around, it will come back to me, eventually..."

As the man stumbled down the street, canteen in hand and spilling its contents all on the pavement, he failed to notice the amount of destruction that was around him, the lack of people, and especially the large spaceship looming in the sky.

"I must say it is a lovely day. I wonder if everyone else is enjoying it...?"

 **Meanwhile...**

Things were not going well for Class A Hero Rank 2, Iaian. The hero dressed as a knight was doing his darn best against the multiheaded monster that stood in front of him, but none of his attacks were doing anything against it. Any damage he did to the monster was instantly healed, it also didn't help when the monster was able to do insane amounts of damage with its bare hands.

 _"I can't keep evading its attacks,"_ he thought as he sidestepped a lightning fast punch that destroyed concrete rubble behind him. _"It is going to eventually hit me when I start to tire."_

"How much longer are you willing to keep this up, weak one?" it said in a multi-disembodied voice. "Resistance is futile and your attacks are pointless."

"Until you fall, I will not cease monster!" he launched himself at the creature and landed multiple hits on it with his katana. He landed and saw all his work slowly being undone by the creature's regeneration.

"You are a pest!" the monster shouted as it shaped its hand into a blade and started to swing it with furor at the knight.

Iaian couldn't block any of those attacks and could only evade them. He doubted that he could withstand a hit from that thing, much less a glancing blow.

"Hmm, maybe I can't crush you...but I CAN crush your resolve!"

"What?"

Iaian didn't know what the monster was talking about until he noticed something in the corner of his eyes.

A drunk man stumbling around a couple hundred yards away from the two, a canteen of some sorts in a hand.

He thought all civilians were evacuated already, but apparently this man didn't know about considering his state.

"You will not harm him!" Iaian shouted.

"Make me," the monster said before disappearing.

* * *

"I didn't know there was a mountain here," the man drunkenly said as he tried to traverse the rocky rubble. He somehow was able to keep his balance though. "I need a drink."

He grabbed his canteen and was about to drink when he tripped and fell on the ground."Oof! Silly me..."

Unbeknownst to him, he didn't notice a large shadow appearing over him.

"Huh? Why did it turn dark...?"

 **X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X~X**

Iaian could only watch in horror as the monster brought his fist down, sending up a large cloud of dust in the air.

"HAHAHAHA! Now you're next!" it said as it turned back to the hero.

Iaian gritted his teeth and was about to charge the monster when a voice stopped both of them in their tracks.

"You are one ugly motherfucker."

The two turned and saw the man standing off to the side, drinking his canteen before swiping his mouth his the back of his hand.

"Impossible!" the monster turned back and saw only a crater with no remains of the man.

"Sir! You must leave, this place is not safe for you!" Iaian shouted.

"Leave? Ha! Why would I leave without confronting this grotesque creature that tried to kill me?"

"You speak with great courage, but that will not save you!"

The monster charged the man and pulled back a fist, but never got to punch. The man had launched himself at the monster, spearing it in its stomach with his head.

The man proceeded to deliver a flurry of punches to the monster's heads before knocking it back with a backward flip-kick and landing perfectly on the ground. He took a quick drink before running towards the monster and slamming into it with his belly.

The impact was so strong the monster blew up into bloody pieces of flesh.

"Serves you right, grotesque one." he said as he took another swig and walked over to Iaian.

"Not bad for an old, drunk guy, huh?" he said to him.

"Sir, I don't think we're safe yet."

"Hm, why...? Oh..."

The man turned back and saw the monster, it was fully reformed and only had one head now with ten eyes, and it looked really PISSED.

"It seemed I underestimated you, now you will PAY HUMAN!" it said as it formed a hand into a large mallet.

The two were able to jump out of the way as the ground under them was crushed.

"Die, die, DIE, DIE!"

The man jumped on the monster's shoulders and pried opened its mouth.

"Drink up." he muttered and dumped the canteen's liquid into the monster's mouth.

The monster shook him off, but the man landed without injury. Suddenly, it started to convulse and dropped to its knees before vomiting up weird purple liquid and eventually things that looked like intestines.

The man walked up to the monster and noticed a bunch of marbles on the ground. He picked them up and eyed them with curiosity.

"No...NO!" the monster tried to reach for the marbles.

"Go to hell."

The marbles were crushed.

* * *

"Too much rice wine," the man said as he watched the monster liquify. "Tsk, amateur."

Then he vomited himself.

"Arg, hate when I do that." and went back to drinking.

He put down his canteen and turned to expressionless Iaian. "Say who are you?"

Iaian blinked before responding. "I am Iaian, A Class Rank 2 Hero."

"Hero huh? Heard you folks before, name's Chen."

Before Iaian could respond, the two heard some commotion behind them. He saw sevearl S Class Heroes running towards them, one of them being his master, Atomic Samurai.

"Iaian!" Atomic shouted. "I'm so glad you're ok. I thought you were a goner when I heard A-City was destroyed."

"I'm fine, master," he said. "Actually, I wouldn't be alive if it weren't for this man right here."

"Him? That fat drunk? Give me a break." Metal Bat said.

"I would watch your words, young man." Chen warned.

Before the situation could escalate, Bang stepped in and pushed Metal Bat behind him. "It's been a long time, Master Chen," Bang said with a slight bow.

"As with you Master Bang." Chen said back before drowning himself in his canteen's contents.

"Hold on, you know this drunk?" Metal Bat asked.

"Yes, me and him go way back. He's a master in drunken martial arts, as told by his current state, as well as a teacher like me. Say how are your students doing?"

"Good, good. I got separated from them a while back, but they'll be fine," he took another chug. "Hey, how's my former student doing? I never heard from him in a while, so I decided to visit him."

"Who's your former student?"

"I forgot his name, but I think you know him as Blast...?"

* * *

 **A/N: I heavily based Chen on Bo' Rai Cho from Mortal Combat. So many attentive readers can spot some references to Bo'.**

 **Fun Fact: Bo' Rai Cho is a play on the Spanish word, borracho, which is drunk in Spanish.**

 **Till next time,**

 **-D.W**


	2. Chapter 2

Silence is the most likely the best to describe the entire scene, actually...shock is a better one to be honest. All of the heroes' mouths were currently touching the ground and their eyes were bugged out in disbelief, even Bang was surprised as well.

"I wished I remembered his actual name, but 'Blast' suits him well," Chen said, not noticing the looks of shock and disbelief on the heroes' faces. "I wonder if he still looks the same...?"

"You...you were his mentor?" Bang sputtered.

"Uh, yes...? Why do you sound surprised? I told you this before."

"When? I do not recall-ow!"

Chen bonked Bang on the head with his canteen. "I told you this many years ago! Are you that forgetful?!" he scolded. "Are you becoming senile? Huh?!"

Bang wanted to rebuke, but he restrained himself. After all, he was talking to a drunk. Instead he let out a soft sigh and replied, "Not exactly, but I think there more pressing matters we have to address first."

"Which is...?"

"It's kinda obvious, Chen."

"...what are we taking about again?"

Everyone facefaulted at this point.

"Just look up, will you?"

Chen looked up, "Oh, that. Yes, I'm quite aware of a giant spaceship hovering over City A, which I presume is this is the remains of," he gestured to the rubble around them. "What else needs to addressed?"

"Are you sure he trained Blast, geezer?" Metal Bat whispered to Bang.

"He did." Bang deadpanned.

"However, I believe we should move soon." Chen said as he looked back up.

"Why?"

"I think the ship is going to bomb us, right..."

Several hatches opened up on the ship's underside in response.

"...now."

"Next time old man, you should open up with that." Metal Bat said.

"Ah, but where is the fun in that?"

The ship released hundreds, perhaps thousands, of explosive shells towards the heroes, who all stood ready to intercept the incoming explosives.

Until they stopped mid-air, a green outline surrounded each of the shells.

"Where would you guys be without me?"

Hovering in the air was Tatsumaki, her entire body surround in the same light green outline.

"Honestly now, do I really have to do everything?" she asked. "Cause it looks like I am."

"Who's the brat?" Chen asked.

"Tatsumaki, S-Class Rank 2 Hero." Bang replied.

"A little girl is your second best hero?"

"She's 28, old man," Metal Bat said. "However, she doesn't act like it, am I RIGHT?!"

"Do you want me to drop these on you?! I don't think so!"

While the two argued, Chen asked the group a question, "Say, why did all of you look surprised that I mentored Blast? Did something happen to him?"

"Blast is the number one hero in the Hero's Association," Bang said. "We hold him in high regard. He's also rumored to be the first hero as well."

Chen blinked. "Number one, huh? That's news to me," he said before taking another swig. "And also, no. I never heard from him for a while."

"Hey, where is he anyways?" he asked.

"His current whereabouts are unknown," Atomic Samurai said. "We don't know if he's still alive."

"I see..." Chen looked up at the spaceship and squinted. "You know, I think someone is confronting whoever is in charge of this ship."

"Someone is?" Bang asked.

"It's a hunch, but I think this person is handling it like how Blast would."

* * *

"Is that everyone?"

It's been thirty minutes since the spaceship exploded and crashed landed on the ground. The rest of the S-Class Heroes rounded up any of the alien survivors and placed them in custody.

"I can't believe Lord Boroes really lost." one said.

"I just wanna go home." another added.

"You guys need to cheer up a bit," Chen said. "It could've been worse, you could've been killed without a second thought."

He took his canteen and dumped some liquid out. "Say, you grotesque creatures need a drink to ease your nerves. I think there may be a bar open some where serving some quality rice wine! Maybe I can get these guys to unchain you so-"

He never got to finish his sentence because he was splattered with the aliens' blood.

A lot of blood.

He raised a hand and used it to wipe the blood off his face. "Ugh, tastes like tequila. You guys have no taste for alcohol."

With that, Chen started to stumble away from the group and away from their sight. Those youngsters could handle whatever was going on right now.

He needed a goddamn nap.

* * *

 **A/N: Hi, this chapter is short.**

 **I don't like that it is short.**

 **But it is** **necessary since the next part won't fit in here.**

 **I will work on the next part.**

 **Patience...**

 **-D.W**


	3. Chapter 3

A lone person walked down the rainy sidewalk of City H. Not much other people were out because of the torrents of water falling from the heavens as well as the time of day it was. It was late at night and the person was trying to get back home to get some well deserved rest.

The said person was a man around his late twenties, his jet black messy hair and unkept mustache was soaked with water. He wore a blue, hoodless windbreaker over a white collared shirt with black pants and shoes. The man had a slight athletic build to him, but looked quite stocky.

"Goddamn security company and their stupid hours," he muttered. "Why can't I have a normal schedule like anyone else?"

 _At least they pay..._ "Beats working at some dumb fast food joint."

After walking a few minutes down the street, he realized something.

"Aw crap, I'm supposed to take a left five blocks ago! Gosh darn it!" he facepalmed and started to turn around...

...only to be grabbed from behind, bagged, and thrown into the trunk of a car.

This day couldn't be any worse for this man...or could it be looking up...?

 **Eventually...**

The man squinted as the bag was pulled off his head, his eyes adjusting to the sudden change in light. As his eyes refocused, he was able to make out a figure that was in front of him.

"Carlos?" the man asked. "What-what is going on?"

Carlos chuckled. The man was a giant, towering over the other men in the room. He was balding and had a large red beard. He wore a green shirt with a white apron and khaki pants and brown shoes. "Ignorance will only make it worse, Vern. You know why I had my men bring you here." he rumbled.

"Carlos, I just came off a fifteen hours shift from work. I'm slightly delusional, and I just want to sleep. How the hell am I supposed to know-oh. Oh, you gotta be kidding me. Really?"

"Yes, your TAB. It is long overdue."

"How much are there? It can't be that much for you to-"

One of Carlos' men dropped a bag full of IOUs next to Vern. "-kidnap me..."

"I warned you MANY times Vern, but this...this is the last straw."

"So what? Are you going to kill me like any cliché guy will do in any type of situation?"

"Kill you?" he put his hand on one of his thugs before letting out a hearty laugh. "He thinks I am going to kill! Isn't that hilarious?!"

"So can I go then? If you're not going to kill me?"

"No, you are still going to die. Just not by me." he motioned to his men. "They will take care of you."

"Oh, very clever..." _I should've seen that coming_

"Anyways, I have two daughters that I need to take to school tomorrow. So farewell, and pleasure doing business with you." he turned and left the warehouse leaving Vern with his men.

"Uh, hi. I guess we start with introductions..." Vern hesitantly said as the thugs started to advance to him. "...and we're skipping the introductions and going straight in. Fine by me."

Luckily, whoever tied the knots to his binds were badly done and was able to free himself with little to no problem. He picked up the chair he was sitting on and quickly swung it at the first thug who charged him. The chair took out the brute before shattering.

Another came at him with a fist, but Vern simply sidestepped and grabbed the man by the arm. Using his leverage, he threw the guy into another thug taking both of them out.

"Are you guys even try-" he was caught off guard by a sucker punch and was sent flying into a pile of crates. "...ok, I'm done playing."

He placed his left hand in his pocket and lunged for the closest thug with his right. He grabbed the man by his neck and slammed him to the ground, causing cracks to form under him. He latched his hand onto another's face and started to drag the man on the ground before sending him flying with a kick.

As more and more thugs ran towards him, Vernn started to look a bit...different. The calm, stoic expression he had was slowly turning into one of a crazed psychopath, and his attacks became more and more violent and wild.

This was all done with one hand, mind you.

"You boys are sure giving me a run for my money! Kinda rusty, but I still got it!" he was smacked in the head with a pipe by a goon that snuck on him. The goon expected him to be knocked out, but instead was grabbed by the head and lifted in the air.

"My, my, trying to kill me? Now that is not very nice," he said with a very sadistic smile. "Maybe I should teach you a lesson...or everyone in this room in fact!"

He lined up in front of the remaining thugs and tossed the man in the air. As the man came down, he clenched his hand into a fist, which started seeping with maroon colored smoke, and slammed it into the man's chest.

"DRILLLLLLL!"

The man was sent helicoptering into the rest of the thugs and the entire group of men were left unconscious and badly hurt.

Vern expression slowly returned to his usual stoicalness and he ran a hand through his hair. "Well, guess I hafta find a new bar then." he said with a shrug as he walked out of the warehouse.

* * *

"Seriously? Too qualified, is that even a thing?"

A woman slumped onto a nearby park bench. She wore a black suit jacket and matching skirt, along with black leggings and heels. Her brown hair was done in a bun with two hairsticks to hold it up. She had a slim, yet curvy build.

Adjusting her purple, sharp-rimmed glasses, she sighed. She'd been turned down from yet another job just because she "was too qualified and would have made everyone look bad". She'd heard of people being not under qualified, but over?

Really?

"I really need to find a proper job soon. How am I supposed to pay rent?" she said with a moan. "Or any other basic necessity?"

She worked at the local supermarket as a cashier, but the pay wasn't up there enough. She barely had enough for rent, much less anything else.

"Lynn? Is that you?"

Lynn removed her hand from her face to see the face of someone she didn't see for quite some time.

The woman standing in front of her was wearing a short white shirt the ended above her stomach, blue jeans and black sneakers. Her long orange hair was put up in a high ponytail. However the most defining feature this woman had was that she was quite muscular to say the least, but kept her womanly curves.

"Roxy! Fancy seeing you here."

Roxy smiled. "I kinda had to look twice, since you look...bigger... than the last time we met."

"Yeah...very late bloomer." Lynn said with a blush.

"So! What have you've been up to egghead?" Roxy asked. "Assume you got some high end job or something, right?"

"Actually, no."

"Wait what?"

"I tried applying to several businesses but they turned me down."

"Why? You are more than capable to be-"

"That's the problem! I'm TOO good at what I do."

Roxy blinked. "Is that a thing?"

"Apparently so. Sounds bullshit to me though," Lynn said with a sigh. "I work at a supermarket to make due, it's very little, but it's enough to pay the rent. What about you?"

"I work at that smoothie store over there." she pointed to the small establishment off in the distance. "Share a space with my GF. She pays half and I pay the other."

"GF?" Lynn asked, a bit confused.

"Girlfriend, egghead. You know men ain't my thing."

 _Men not here thi-oh...OH OH!_ "You sound like you have it good..."

"Say...why don't you come crash with us?"

"No! T-that's not necessary-"

"Lynn, I may be reckless, but I am far from stupid. I know that you're in the shitter, and you, egghead, should know that too." she pulled out a receipt and a pen and started writing something on it. "This is where I live and my number, I ain't forcing you, but it's your choice."

She gave the paper to Lynn, who accepted it.

"My shift starts in a few minutes so I gotta run. See yah."

Lynn watched as Roxy walked off. She sighed as she looked at the paper that was given to her. _Well, at least the rent wouldn't be so high._

 **Later...**

"You know I don't drink a lot Roxy," Lynn said.

"Oh lighten up will you?" Roxy said. "Obviously things haven't been going your way, and you kinda need to loosen up."

It was late at night and Roxy had invited Lynn to have a couple of drinks at a bar she favored. Lynn had changed into a more casual blue shirt, khaki pants, and some sneakers.

"Fine, I just don't take alcohol well."

"Ha, ha! It's just gonna be like old times!" Roxy said a she pulled the shorter woman closer to her. "If only the psycho was here..."

"Urg, gah, meh...ROXI! C-c-can't breath!"

"Oh! Sorry!" Roxi let go of Lynn, who spent the next few minutes trying to catch her breath.

"Still got your strength huh?" she managed to wheeze out.

"Yeah...still kinda hard for me to control it. My bad."

"At least you don't burn things as easily anyone as far as I can see."

"True, got that down."

Roxi suddenly sneezed and a blast of fire incinerated a trashcan. Luckily, no one else was around to witness that.

"Well, except for that. That I can't really control, sometimes," Roxi said as she sniffed. "Don't worry, we have a fire extinguisher just in case."

"If I remember your drinking patterns from yore, I'm surprised you never burnt anything down yet."

"Whatever, at least I can hold my alcohol, egghead."

The bar was located a couple of blocks from Roxi's apartment. A small watering hole with a decent amount of foot traffic. However, tonight was pretty slow, and only one or two patrons were in the bar.

The two women took up seats at the counter.

"The usual Roxi?" the bartender asked.

"Yes, Maurice."

The bartender nodded and went off to prepare the drinks.

"So, how's life been?" Roxi asked.

"Well, you kinda got the jist of it this afternoon," Lynn said with a sigh. "Honestly, I just think they're afraid of having a woman outperform them."

"Male superiority, shall I...?"

"No, you are not beating them up. That's illegal and possibly a quick way to get on the Heroes Association's bad side."

"Even if I don't use-"

"Yes, most likely they're going to send a C or B-Class hero after you if anything."

"...hey, what would we be if we tried out for the Heroes Association, hypothetic speaking?"

"Us? I dunno, I'm not really into that hero stuff, too much goddamn work."

"Work? I thought you like work."

"I only do work since no one else is willing to do it."

Roxi shrugged and was about to say something when someone's voice started to rise.

"Oh you gotta be SCREWING with me!"

The two turned and found a guy getting frustrated with the claw game the bar had in the corner.

"You piece of shit! I had that pink unicorn in my grasp and you had to drop it!" the man slammed the side of the machine. "You're lucky I can't break you..."

"Hold on. Is that...?"

The two looked at each other and decided to go over to the man, who was still ranting about the "rigged" machine. Roxi tapped the man on the shoulder...

"WHAT?!" he spun around only to look up. His expression turned to slight shock. "Oh hiiiiiiiiiii Roxi. Fancy seeing you here."

His attention turned to Lynn. "Holy shit, Lynn. You actually look like a woman now-"

 _ **"What was that Vern?"**_ Vern suddenly found his health to be in dire danger.

"T-that was a compliment! And I wasn't finished! I meant to add on: the "sexy librarian" is a good look for you."

"Better...now what are you doing here?"

"Well, uh, I'm trying to get the pink unicorn. I have the other colors but that one-"

"More general."

"Uh, I'm waiting for my shift to start. I work for a security firm, like a few blocks from here," he said. "What about you two, never thought I would see either of you again."

"Lynn is broke dead, I work at Smooth's Smoothies."

"Wait, seriously? Is that even possible?"

"Apparently being too good is a thing," Lynn said with a sigh.

"On the plus, she's going to be roomies with me! It will be like old times!" Roxi said as she hugged Lynn.

"Hold on, how long have you guys been living here?"

"I'd say a couple of years." Lynn said. Roxi nodded her head as well.

"I'm surprised we've never bumped into each other, strange...yet we meet in a bar."

"..."

"Well, hey our drinks are here," Roxi said as she looked back at the counter. "Want anything Vern?"

"Uh, something...strong. I'll catch up to you gals in a moment."

As the two walked back, Vern got out a knife and picked the lock on the claw machine. He grabbed the unicorn and stuffed it into his coat pocket.

"Fuck you." he said to the machine as he closed it back up.

 **A/N: OOOOOOOOOOOOO, spooky side story that is very** **vague, OOOOOOOOOOO.**

 **Who are these people?**

 **Why are they so important?**

 **And what is the pretty unicorn for?**

 **Till next time,**

 **-D.W**


	4. Chapter 4

"How can a lose track of a single guy?" Metal Bat said. "I mean he was only a drunk old man."

Much of the S-Class Heroes were gathered in their new HQ that Metal Knight built. Their initial meeting was about rebuilding what was destroyed by the aliens as well as how to prevent such a catastrophe from happening again. However, it soon spiraled into discussing about the mysterious man that helped them out.

"Chen isn't the one that likes to appear in public," Bang said. "Much less focus on situations like what we've experienced."

"So he only shows up when he's needed?" Atomic Samurai asked.

"To put it into better context, Chen picks his fights very carefully. He's very...selective on who he fights."

"Well that sounds stupid," Tatsumaki said. "Why even fight at all if you're not going to fight all of your battles?"

"Chen considers himself a vigilante, first off. He doesn't want anything to do with the Heroes Association," Bang said. "He's a "free spirit" in other words."

"Secondly, his technique, drunken boxing, relies heavily on deception. Very hard to predict, but if you can catch a pattern, then it's easy to beat him. Emphasis on "if" mind you."

"I assume that it's the first reason he doesn't show face, right old man?" Metal Bat asked.

"Yes, I find it hard that someone can actually predict his movement. Even I had a hard time tracking him when we sparred, never saw a man that size move so fast."

"Say, I heard he was a teacher as well," Atomic Samurai said. "Did he teach anyone else other than Blast?"

"He did. I don't know how much, since he only talked about Blast and three others-"

A bunch of murmurs went up after Bang said that.

"Hold on, are you only telling us now that there is possibly three other people, who may be just as powerful as Blast, running around out there?" Metal Bat interrupted.

"Look, I do not know if these three are as powerful as Blast is, but I know they are not threats."

"And how do you know that?" Child Emperor asked.

"Do you really think someone who had Chen as a teacher would turn evil?" Bang deadpanned.

"So who are these people anyways Gramps?" Tatsumaki asked.

"Well, I do not know their actual names because Chen never referred them as that. I only know their nicknames," Bang said. "They are: The Psychopath, Dragon Lady, and Storm Goddess..."

"..."

"Oh dear..." Bang said as he facepalmed. "I may have overlooked this."

"I really want to hit you right now Gramps."

 **Elsewhere...**

Chen slowly came to, his head was pounding from yet another hangover from the result of another night of drinking.

"Ugh, no more cheap beer," he mumbled as he smashed a bottle on the ground. "It always makes me act funny."

He stumbled to his feet and took a swig from his canteen.

"Now where am I?" he looked around and found himself on top of a skyscraper. "Ah, high ground. Nice thinking, Chen."

The next part, dear readers, is briefly stated since, well, it is not very interesting to actually read. Since it involves Chen falling down several flights of stairs. To those who would WANT to know, he fell down ALL of the stairs the emergency stairwell had.

ALL FOURTY-FOUR LEVELS OF STAIRS.

Yes, he fell, or rather tumbled, down all those goddamn stairs. Luckily, he wasn't hurt from the potentially life-threatening experience, but then again, who cares?

"Ngggh, note to self. Never take stairs...again."

He got to his feet once again and managed to get outside and onto the streets, where it was safer.

The next few moments Chen wandered around, trying to get his bearings. Such task would be easy, for someone who wasn't addled by the effects of alcohol.

For those who are wondering, Chen is currently in City Z. Don't ask how he got there, drunk people get in weird place all the time. He slowly made his way from the bustling business area and into the condemned area of the city. This part of the city had multiple reports of mysterious beings being sighted, and many of the residents had moved away to safer places.

However on the bright side, the rent there is cheap.

"Finally some peace and quiet. I never thought there would be a city which had some quiet zones."

As Chen walked through the empty streets, something was following him from the shadows. The drunk didn't care, or even notice.

"Hm, this silence is unnerving. I'm starting to take back what I said earlier." he mused. "And why is everything closed?"

He tapped on a closed establishment window. "Hello, anyone home?"

Chen was about to turn around when he noticed something in the reflection of the glass. He quickly jumped to the side as something tried to hit him from behind, and it crashed into the window.

"Not even noon yet..." he muttered as he took a quick swig before attaching the canteen to his belt. He got into a fighting stance and waited for whatever tried to sneak up on him to come out from the building.

A large black wolf-like creature with red eyes leapt out from the window and back into daylight. A large red scar went down its left eye. It growled at Chen before snapping its teeth at him.

"That scar is so cliché." Chen said.

The animal must have understood English since snarled at him before letting out a howl. Several more of its brethren appeared from the shadows.

"Ah shit."

* * *

Genos was on his way back from the supermarket to Saitama's apartment. Saitama had mentioned that he wanted some things from the supermarket, which were on sale, and Genos had offered to pick it for him.

It had been quiet ever since the battle a couple of days, where Saitama managed to defeat the leader of the Black Matter Aliens. Genos didn't mind the respite after all his master seemed to enjoy it.

Little did he know that something was about to break that silence.

"GAH! Stupid mutts! I didn't do anything to you, stop chasing me!"

Genos turned around and saw a man being chased by several...wolves as Genos could put those creatures as. He set the bag of groceries down before speeding off towards the group. He slammed his fist into the nearest wolf creature before shooting a flurry of energy bolts at the rest.

The wolf creatures, surprised at the sudden arrival, decided not to continue their hunt and quickly turned around and fled back into the desolate parts of the town.

The Demon Cyborg made sure there wasn't any more of the creatures around before turning to the man. "Are you ok sir-?"

However, the man had disappeared.

Genos scanned the surrounding area for the man, but found no trace of him. He wanted to go and find the man, but he had perishables with him.

He made a note to try and find the man after he put the milk in the fridge.

* * *

"Hmm, Robo-Boy," Chen said as he watched Genos run off. He didn't really want to stick around after the robot man kicked the shit outta those wolves and was watching from afar on top of an apartment. "These heroes are becoming more and more...I can't even think of a word to describe it."

He chugged from his canteen and his expression became serious. "At least...they can over come what will happen next...I hope."

He looked toward the horizon and gritted his teeth. "Maybe I should find my pupils. I think they need more help."

* * *

 **A/N: 'insert ranting about how underdeveloped everything is right now'**

 **Chapters might not come out quickly because of life so stay tuned.**

 **Till next time,**

 **-D.W**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: For those wondering, this side story, starting from when the story started two chapters ago, takes place a couple hours after Chen wakes up in the previous chapter. (Not including the first scene)**

 **Back in City H...**

"So Vern, how is your mental state?" Lynn asked. "I presume it's been keeping in line?"

"Oh yeah, it's been fine. We've gotten to a point where we can live without tearing to bits, though a bit of booze kinda helps as well." Vern said as he swirled the shot glass of scotch around.

"Shouldn't you not be drinking? Aren't you going to work?" Roxi asked.

"Does it matter, Rox? At this point alcohol is more like medicine to me, it helps me to...concentrate and focus."

"That not her point Vern," Lynn said. "She means...you know what forget it."

"Whatever smartypants, those fuckers don't even care about their workers anyways. So they can stick a fat one up their arse."

The three sat in silence for a couple of minutes. The television blared out some news that no one really cared about.

"Anyone hear what happened in City A?" Vern asked. "Aliens I think it was."

"Oh yeah, aliens came and razed the city to the ground," Roxi said. "It was pretty bad."

"I wonder if the Heroes Association is losing their touch," Vern said. "After all, remember the City J incident?"

"Yeah, luckily that C-Class hero showed up and defeated that monster, especially after it defeated two S-Classes," Lynn said. "Can't believe people are accusing him with taking all the credit, especially when he's the only one that made a dent on that thing."

"That's unfortunate to say the least." Roxi said. "Maybe he is the hero this place needs..."

"Hero?! That bald-headed freak shouldn't even be called a HERO!" a random patron yelled. "Several other heroes laid down their bodies against that monster and all he did was one punch it. Puh-leeze!"

"And there's the migraine...coming back to haunt me." Lynn muttered.

"It's just an opinion dude," Vern said. "Chill, ok?"

The man continued to rant for a good while until bar employees escorted the man from the bar.

"Thank god he's gone. Any longer and I would've lost my shit." Lynn said as she rubbed her head.

"Still have those migraines? Honestly, I thought you'd grew out of that by now." Vern said. "Must suck for you whenever you go to a loud event-ooooooooooo-"

"You better retract that burn before I turn you into a pretzel." she hissed.

"...annnnnnnd retracted."

Roxi chuckled and sighed. "You two act like an old married couple." she said. "It's adorable."

The redhead got glared at. "What? You two do, you basically act the same in a sense. Well, Vern is mentally unstable and you're short-tempered. You both are sadistic when you're unhindged."

"Stop please, I don't want to hear any more." Lynn said.

"And I take personal offense to that," Vern said. "I'm NOT mentally unstable, more like socially awkward."

Another uncomfortable minute past once again as the three returned to their drinks.

"Have you two caught up on the latest episode of 'Game of Bones'?" Roxi asked.

* * *

On the outskirts of City H, a large demon-like monster stared down at the city from atop an overlook. It had red skin and two curly ram horns sticking out of its head, and was dressed only in a brown loincloth. It had large, bulging muscles that would intimidate even the most toughest guys out there.

The demon had a small army of smaller demons, who still looked pretty intimidating though, standing beside him.

"Today I, Dezorus the Deadly, will be the first to conquer the human realm for the UNDERWORLD!" he bellowed. "No one will stand in my way! No ONE!"

The other demons roared in response to their leader's wishes.

"The invasion of upper realm begins NOW!"

* * *

"YOU REALLY THINK JUNO IS THE BEST BAE?!" Lynn yelled. "Bitch please! Fhari is the best bae in the goddamn series first off. Secondly, Juno is just a stupid slut who needs her ass saved by Captain Dogo every time!"

"EXCUSE ME?! Roxi yelled back. "Juno is perfectly capable of defending herself, she only gets captured because the enemy always uses some kind of crutch to SCREW HER OVER!"

"HA! FHARI DOESN'T HAVE A TRUE COUNTER, SHE'S THE BEST!"

Vern slammed his fist on the counter. "YOU BITCHES ARE WRONG! BEATRICE IS BEST GIRL!" he flashed two birds. "SUCK IT!"

For the past thirty minutes, the trio's conversation on the highly rated t.v show 'Game of Bones' went from a light conversation to a heated debate, which was, well, which of the (usually) scantly clad female characters was 'the best'.

It didn't help that the alcohol only added more fuel to the fire.

"BEATRICE! That slut is even more of a slut than Juno! Why the fuck do you like her?!" Lynn yelled.

"Well excuse me, smartypants! She may look like one, but she ain't! Her attitude says otherwise, unlike yours, biotch!"

"You're lucky that this fat OAF is in the way. If she wasn't here, you would be on your ass right now!"

"EXCUSE ME?! Who do you'd think you're calling fat, bitch?!" Roxi growled.

"She is, still pudgey aren't yeah?" Vern said.

Roxi slammed a fist into Vern's face and sent him flying into a nearby storage closet. There was a bit, wait no, a lot, of crashing and things breaking. "I TOTALLY DID NOT DESERVE THAT!" he yelled from the closet. "Fatass."

"You are slowly signing your **death warrant,** Vern!"

"I plea innocent on ground of pure insanity! Plus it's true, I never lie!"

"He's kinda right. He never lies." Lynn reasoned. "Though he could be a little less blunt."

"You started this, egghead. I wouldn't get cocky just yet." the larger woman said as she glared at Lynn. Her eyes briefly turned into reptilian slits before returning to normal.

Lynn rolled her eyes and went back to her drink.

Vern stumbled out of the closet with no injuries and dusted himself off. "How did I manage to fly in here? I mean this is perpendicular to the counter." he mumbled to himself.

He walked back to the bar counter and sat back on his stool. Surprisingly none of the other bar customers cared what just happened.

However, they did react to a couple of demons jumping though the bar's front window.

The bar cleared out in little to no time, but not everyone left. The three 'friends' still sat in their seats, totally oblivious on what just happened. Their obliviousness could be a result of them continuing their conversation.

"In all honestly, how did our little conversation turn into a raging shitfest in the first place?" Vern asked.

"I don't know, but I don't care since you got slugged in the face, which makes me slightly happier." Lynn said.

Vern threw his glass at Lynn, but missed and hit one of the demons in the face, causing it to snarl.

"Well I'll be damned. You don't see that everyday." Vern said. "Or before you die."

"When did they come?" Roxi asked. "Did we miss something?"

The demon who had a glass thrown at its face roared and lunged toward Vern. But Vern leaned backwards, allowing Roxi to slam her fist into the demon's face. The demon soared out of the bar, though the window, and into a parked car, causing its alarm to go off.

The other demon ripped a large table off the ground and hurled it at the three. Vern punched the table, causing it to shatter before it hit them. Lynn, in the mean time, launched herself at the demon and swung her leg at the demon, sending it flying into the wall of the bar and leaving a demon-shaped hole.

"Hm, that was easy," she said as she readjusted her glasses. "Honestly I thought spawns of hell would be slightly harder to defeat."

Suddenly the same demon shot back out of the hole, and hurled itself towards Lynn. It pulled back a fist with full intent to smash HER face in.

Lynn's hand started to crackle with electricity. She curled her hand into a fist and backhanded the demon. Electricity surged through the demon, briefly showing its skeleton, before it was sent into the same car where the first demon laid.

"Better, but still pathetic."

"You think it was only those two, cause there better not be any more-" Roxi started to say before an alert stopped her.

"Attention all residents of City H! A Demon-level threat has been detected. Please evacuate the city in a calm and orderly manner." a loudspeaker said.

 _"I find that ironic..."_ Vern thought.

"...and me and my big mouth..." she mumbled before realizing something. "I have to go."

"Wait, why?" Vern asked.

"Rita, I wanna make sure she's safe."

"Who's Rita?"

"Her girlfriend." Lynn answered.

"Oh yeah, you're not turned on by men." Vern said as he stood up off his stool. "How'd I forget that?"

Just then several more demons decided to arrive at the bar. All looking kinda pissed cause they beat up their comrades.

"And cue cliché scene where everyone tries to kill us." Lynn said as she rolled her sleeves up.

"I think I have to call in sick today." Vern said as he tossed his jacket to the side. "How far is it to your place, Rox?"

"Five minutes, ten tops." she said as she cracked her knuckles. "Are we racing?"

"Depends," Lynn asked. "Are we just finding your roomie or having fun?"

Roxi thought for a second. "Find Rita first, then we can have fun."

"Sounds good to me." Vern said as a grin crept on his face.

* * *

Class-A Heroes Golden Ball and Spring Mustachio were first on scene to confront the disturbance in City H. It didn't take long for them to encounter what was causing the disturbance, and the two sprung into action.

"Hey, Spring," Golden Ball said as he used his slingshot to take down a demon that charged him. "This doesn't look like a Demon-Level Threat. Looks like more of a Tiger."

"Appearances may be misleading, my friend," Spring said back. "Don't let your guard down."

Suddenly a man was thrown their way and into a car.

"Sir! Are you ok?" Golden Ball asked as he and Spring ran over to the man.

"Totally dude," the man said as he got up. "Just got chucked by a demon, no biggie."

"I suggest you should lay down so you can get medical attention-" Spring started to say.

"Medical attention? Screw that, I've been through worse before," the man said as he got to his feet and dusted himself off. "Nice 'stache dude."

A demon ran up to them and screeched. The man in response tore off the car's door and hurled it at the creature, slicing it in half.

"Love to stay and chat, but my friends are having a contest on who can kill the most demons, later." the man bolted down the street and out of view of the two. "You fuckers better not be killing without me!"

The two heroes blinked and looked at each other, still processing what exactly just happened.

"We should see what's going on." Spring said.

"Yeah..."

* * *

"Get off ME!" Roxi shouted as a demon hopped on her back. She grabbed the demon and threw it to the ground, cracking it in the process. She then planted her foot on top of its head, splattering blood and brain matter all over the ground. "I am not a ride, dammit!"

The trio battled their way to Roxy's apartment and found that Rita was out of town. So the three went on a demon killing spree since, why not?

Roxi punched, kicked, threw...you know what...she basically tore though the demon ranks with little to no effort. Her brute strength and relentlessness to pummel any demon by any means necessary made her a force to be reckoned with.

To put it into context, it was a gorilla smashing ants...and the gorilla was in a steamroller.

On the other hand, Lynn struck down each monster, but not with the same brutality Roxi employed. She nimbly dodged each attack the demons threw at her before striking her target with deadly accuracy. Each strike was powerful enough to kill each demon, but not enough to, say, explode a demon into a million pieces. It wasn't as 'flashy' as Roxi's display, but it was just as effective.

Lynn formed a gun with her right hand and pointed it a hoard of demons headed her way. Electricity crackled through her hand in white sparks.

"Boom."

The discharge jumped from demon to demon, cooking them to a crispy perfection.

Yum. (Just like Mama would've cooked them)

"Where's Vern?" Lynn asked. "I haven't seen him for five minutes."

"I dunno, but-" Roxi inhaled and let out a large blue flame that reduced a bunch of demons to ash. "He got knocked pretty far when we confronted the whole army."

"True, but he's usually back by now..."

"Hi guys!" Vern said as he landed in front of Lynn, smashing a demon in the process. "Sorry I'm late, I saw this cool radio that would go very well with this montage. Just had to have it."

"Why?"

"Cause every major battle scene HAS to have some music, DUH!" he put the radio down and turned it on.

 **(Music: Hot Right Now by Dj Fresh ft. Rita Ora)**

"Why can't I help but feel this is cliché?" Lynn asked.

"Well, to be honest, this song is great to work out to," Roxi said. "Love it."

"Oh! One other thing..."

"What is it, Vern?"

"I MAY or MAY not have...pissed off their leader." Vern said as he twiddled his thumbs. "And he's coming our way...like now."

Just then a very LARGE demon appeared in front of the three. He was at least ten heads taller than Roxi.

"YOU HUMANS **DARE** TO STOP THE DEZORUS THE DEADLY! I WILL **ELIMINATE** YOU PESTS!" he roared.

The three blinked, looked at each other, and blinked once again.

"What was his name again, Thesaurus?" Roxi asked. "Kinda hard with all the yelling."

"Ooooh, that must why he's pissed," Vern said. "Cause his parents named him after a stupid book."

"Sounds logical, I would be a little ticked off as well." Lynn agreed.

The demon lord actually recoiled in shock from the answer he got, but recomposed himself. "MY NAME IS **DEZORUS**! NOT **THESAURUS** , STUPID HUMANS!"

"Still hearing Thesaurus amigo," Roxi said. "Lynn, Vern you ready?"

"WHAT?!"

The demon didn't notice that two of the humans got to the top of two nearby businesses across from each other and were each charging up an attack. Lynn's arm crackled with white electricity while Vern's was covered in a maroon aura and shaking violently.

"CONTACT!" Vern yelled as he and Lynn launched themselves towards the demon's head.

The two fists made contact with the head and it exploded into a shower white and red light. When the light died down, the head was nowhere to be seen and the headless body flopped to the ground.

"That counts as one." Roxi said as she approached Vern and Lynn, who both landed safely on the ground.

"Whatever, I don't care," Vern said with a yawn. "I'm going to bed, catch some zzz's, later."

"Us too, see you Vern." Lynn said.

The two parties left in separate directions, unbeknownst to them they were being watched by Golden Ball and Spring Mustachio.

"Call the Association," Golden Ball said.

"One step ahead of you." Spring replied.

"No one gonna believe this..."

* * *

 **A/N: Quick things I want to address:**

 **1\. I do not know who's the most powerful out of the three. Vern, Lynn, and Roxi are powerful in their own way.**

 **2\. Threat levels are divided into the following categories (from lowest to highest): Wolf, Tiger, Demon, Dragon, God. (I wonder why Tiger is higher than Wolf, and Dragon higher than Demon, seems weird. I would have it as: Tiger, Wolf, Dragon, Demon, God.)**

 **A major thing I want to address is something that I have recently seen in someone else's story. I do not tolerate any hateful comments, reviews, , etc. Any of such will be** **deleted and reported. I only accept constructive** **criticism, any other negative comments (including but not limited to: death threats, racism, bigotry, etc) will be ignored, deleted, and reported. This also applies to other writers, guests, and others who view this site.**

 **Be nice to each other, ok?**

 **Till next time,**

 **-D.W**


	6. Author's Note

**UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHH...**

 **'SLAM!' (head hits keyboard)**

 **Take 2**

 **Hello everyone, I have an announcement to make.**

 **Despite the current success of this story...I don't like it. The concept I have for the story is a good one, but I just feel that the content the current story has is...misplaced.**

 **Since the posting of the last chapter, I have come to the** **conclusion** **that the story should be about the three side characters: Vern, Lynn, and Roxi.**

 **Why?  
**

 **Well, for one, I figured a story about them would be pretty interesting and also I kinda find it hard to tie it together with Chen. That and I don't really want to write about Chen.**

 **Yeah, I hate the main character.**

 **Anyway, a new story will come up eventually, most likely some time after this update gets out.**

 **Hang in there,**

 **-D.W**


End file.
